Ever Singing For Joy

The changing of the seasons is always a welcomed experience in Alabama.  To go from the exhaustive heat of Summer to the crisp (albeit brief) chill of the Autumn air to landing the plane in the cantankerous, somewhat unpredictable Winter... the narrative of the changing seasons parallels life so well.  As a family, we've enjoyed some really great, memory filled moments over the past 6 months; we've also had some really tough, also unforgettable moments during that time as well.  The main takeaway is that much like the seasons, changes in life are inevitable and with each of life's seasons there are ups and downs and, yet, everything keeps moving forward. Undoubtedly, it seems that some of my recent, relatively vague facebook posts have generated a little bit of curiosity so let's shoot back to a little over a month ago (right before Christmas) and recap what's been going on. This stands to be a fairly long post catching everyone up so if you really don't want to...

Waiting, Straining, Enduring... Reading, Listening, Praying... The road we are traveling is anything but straight, smooth and uneventful.  Over the past few months, I've sat back and watched Ashley put her thoughts together for these blog posts.  I'd take what she wrote on her iPhone and retype it all out here.  It's been so insightful to post what she's feeling.  However, tonight, I'm taking the helm.   It seems like our frequency of writing posts has waned over the past months, and while that has not been the intention, it is a product of circumstance.  Much like everyone  else in the world, we've been preoccupied with shifting schedules, COVID concerns, lifestyle adjustments and managing the kids (that's an entirely different post for another time).  We seem to only write these brief snippets into our world when we have an MRI or doctor visit.  This post being no exception.  However, with that being said, I thought I'd take a few...

My soul is in deep anguish. How long, Lord, how long? Psalm 6:3 Suffering; in a small part.  That's what this stage of life feels like. "Lord please take it away.  I need you more than ever.  Lord, I love you.  God, please save me.  I am weak and faint.  God, you hear my prayer, I know you do.  I'm crying out for mercy." ...recently, my prayers to God have looked something like this. As a Christian, suffering shouldn't be a surprise.  But, I do get surprised.  Maybe a good tattoo would help with remembering to not be surprised :) [I can feel David's scoff from here] These last couple of weeks... they've been extra difficult.  Cancer has been kickin' my tail. I'm hurting in a lot of different ways.  My body just feels broken .  My heart is certainly fragile .  My energy is all but non-existent . Having cancer feels like a full time job, with no vacations or weekends.  Whether it is simple daily tasks, doctors' visits, ...

May is Brain Cancer Awareness month!  I don't know why I put an exclamation mark at the end of the sentence, other than to say I am really excited to share these moments with you. Brain Cancer is a funny subject.  Bringing awareness to it can make for some uncomfortable moments, but it does provide for opportunities to learn more and understand more about a specific cancer that can be really scary.  One thing this month is not, though, is a time for pity.  It is a time to listen, learn and care for our 'family' with brain cancer.  The weird thing is, for everyone that has brain cancer we are all bonded through that common point.  In that sense, it doesn't matter what race or creed or tribe, we all fight as one. Of course, like any other cancer awareness month, there is a color associated with Brain Cancer Month.  Here's the fun part: it's gray!  Though it may seem underwhelming as a color, there is a bit of humor in it.  The brain is comp...

Have you ever had a verse that just lands so perfectly in a season that you know it was God ordained to hear it? When we put the girls down at night, we do a short Bible devotional.  There's one page in the book that our youngest asks for EVERY night.  We think it's really more about the picture (a cup of milk that is running over because the mom is continuing to pour milk in it).  There have been literal tantrums thrown in our house by said daughter over this very topic.  We ALL know this verse because we read this page frequently.  We ALL know it is on page 209 in the book. You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies; you anoint my head with oil; my cup overflows. Psalm 23:5 The first time we actually read this devotion... it sat heavy on my heart.  ...my cup overflows. What a simple verse that has taken up root in my heart.  These little words felt so distant from me.  When I look at my cup right ...

Tunnels are interesting creations.  They are passageways from one point to another.  Sometimes they are big enough for people to move through, sometimes animals create their own and even still, water has the ability to channel its way underground creating its own tunnel.  Tunnels are meant for movement; whether intentional or through the natural unfolding of life.  The thing about tunnels, though, is that there is a start and an end, no one lives forever inside of one.  There is an old saying that there is a light at the end of the tunnel.  It is usually a phrase meant to encourage those who are in the thick of a situation.  When times are toughest, moments are darkest and encouragement is most needed. To see that light at the end of the tunnel, would signify that the darkness is soon to be extinguished by the light... that the journey is nearing its completion. We are certainly in the midst of a tunnel right now.   The sequence of ev...

I don't know where to begin.  A new beginning usually comes after something has ended.  So, maybe I don't know where to begin because I don't know where it all ended. I'm starting chemo on Wednesday (Feb. 26th).  It takes so much out of me. It hurts.  When I finished chemo the last time, my body was so weak and fragile.  Starting chemo again brings up memories that I'd rather forget.  It's not fun.  I lost a lot of weight.  My veins grew tired of being pricked.  At night, I'd lay on the floor next to a trashcan.  I would be sick all night... just trying to make it through.  Minute by minute, hour by hour and day by day... Chemo is HARD. There are different types of chemo with different types of side effects... but, if you are in this season or trying to recover; I love you and you are not alone. Behold, God is mighty, and does not despise any; he is mighty in strength of understanding. Job 36:5 So, let's step back and s...